Moile pour le Mallu

Macbeth and his three whacked out witches have cursed me. I am paying the price of making fun of Malayalee names. Here is a collective list that I have been collecting over the years:

Mind you these are official names.

Breezy
Blessy
Bendy
Princy
Happymon & Honeymon (brothers…yes…alas)
Greeny (there is the north indian equivalent: Pinky)
Telmy (pronounced as tell-me…as in…what?)
Nojin (Clearly the brother is, Yes-jin)
Sojin (My bad)
Jetsy (zoom)
Rejin
Tendril (yes, as in hair…and I haven’t made this up)
Gendil (A mallu is a simble Gendil-man)
Gromit (Wallace and…?)
Rogeo
Gejo (yes Varghese, my Bhai, your name too) and it’s alternatives Jijo
Joji
Jesmi
Jendi
Lijon
Tijon
Sijon
Tijo
Sijo
Bijo
Nobin
Novin (which sounds like a trade name for Novocain or an OC pill)
Bovin (add an ‘e’ and you get…? Hint: a form of tuberculosis)
Mando
Pando
Moley (name of recipe of de jour)
Mol
Money


Potentials to this list: By Gejo (my bhai). These are the names he concocted for the most adorable baby in the world – my nephew Gubbu Singh:

Subjohn
Johnsub (sandwich?)

Thankfully he chose Tulsi’s husband’s name (as in Kyunki saans bhi kabhi bahu thi) instead. Mihir…amar…hai…dot com? Instead of a future as a coconut oil baron, Gubbu can now have a career with Balaji Telefilms.


All of the following are substitutes for a brilliant name… ‘Sebastian’
Sibi,
Sabu
Sebi (not SEBI, as in the stock exchange)
Siji
Siju
Saji


Here is a more seasoned list. Check this out
Interested in the formulation of Mallu names? Read this

As for me – I think I’ll name my kid Pukey.

So…them crazy witches have cursed me…and I’ll probably have to delete this post if the fates have truly sealed my fate…

Until then in praise of the glorious state with the highest education rates yet the poorest sense of nomenclature:

I give you jest a simble resipee (maybe that should be the name) favored by the peepul of the gelf:

Fish Moilee (pronounced as Moley…which is also...in the list)

Spice quotient: Fair...i think this is the least spicy but some may find it spicy


Fish…white fish is better: use surma or pomfret. (take enough for 4 people)
1" cinnamon stick (dalchini, idiot!)
2 green cardamoms (elaichi…dumb@ss)
5-6 cloves of garlic sliced,
1 tablespoon ginger slivers
4 green chillies
1 onion sliced
1 tomato diced, plus another sliced later for garnish
Turmeric powder 1 tsp
1 cup water
½ tsp coarsely crushed black peppercorns
1 tablespoon(s) lime juice
Curry leaves (as per your taste)
2 cup coconut milk
Oil…preferably coconut. 2 tablespoons.
Salt to taste


Heat the oil in a heavy-bottomed pan till hot and fry the cinnamon and elaichi till light brown. Add the garlic, ginger, green chillies and onions. Sauté for till the onions have turned pink or brownish if you have red color blindness.

Add the turmeric, diced tomato, crushed pepper, curry leaves, the fish, water and rest of the ingredients except the coconut milk and mix gently. Cover and cook on very low level for another till the fish is tender and cooked. Stick a fork in it and you’ll know.

Reduce the heat to very low and add the coconut milk (DO NOT use high heat as coconut milk tends to curdle). Mix gently and simmer for a minute or two.

Garnish with fried tomato slices.